Namo amitabha Buddhaya, y'all.
This here's a religious establishment. Act respectable.

Wednesday, October 8, 2008

Out of the Political Closet

Meters swum today: 1500.
Playing on the iPod: Rob Whitesides-Woo, "Mountain Light"

This morning I found myself clinging to the side of the Jaccuzzi and singing out loud in German. Before I get to that, however, I'm for Obama. Hope that's not a big shock to anybody. If it is, take a deep breath, sit down, and drink a glass of water. Better? Good.

I came to Obama late. I was for Edwards for quite a while. I thought he was too pretty to get elected, though as it turned out, something quite a bit south of his face would have kept him out of the Oval Office. Look, I'm all for having as much sex as possible, with as many people as possible, for as long as possible, with the caveat that A. everybody involved is a consenting adult and a willing participant, and B. whenever there's a penis involved, a condom is used. However, once you walk down the aisle and say "I do," that should be it. You just took a vow, to yourself, to your partner and to the greater society. To be brief, fool around before you're married, not after. Most especially, don't cheat on your wife while she's being treated for terminal cancer and father a child with another woman. Okay? That's unconscionable. That's just Right Out. Most especially do not do this while running for President.

That aside aside, I was for Hillary, even voted for her in the primary. But as it turned out, I'm glad Obama was the nominee. I think he's the better choice for lots of reasons. It's starting to look like he might even have a shot at winning this election, which means we the people would be less screwed over than we would be if the other guy won, at least in my opinion. So now you know. My home state of Texas will probably go with the other guy (though some polls are saying it'll be close), but myself will be casting the vote for the handsome black dude.

Back to this morning and the Jaccuzzi. Apparently we had a debate last night, which I missed because I was out for dinner with our time traveling neocraftsperson friends and then rummaging around under my bed with Tracy looking for my missing ring (she found it! She rocks! More on this later.) As I was doin' my stretches I heard a woman arguing with a member of the swim team. Little snatches of her diatribe floated into my concsciousness. Immediately the Squirrel Committee fired up (those are the voices in my head; one of them sounds like my mother, one is probably Joan and I'm not sure who the others are) demanding I respond at once. Meantime I hung onto the Jaccuzzi wall, trying to stretch faster (this is not possible) while whispering to myself, Do not go over there. Do not get involved in that conversation. Do not start arguing with total strangers about who they're going to vote for and why.

Then the lady said, "...and the world leaders want Obama to win because they think he's weak. They think he'll go along with them," and something in my head just kind of went snap! The Squirrel Committee swung into overdrive. Yeah? What's wrong with cooperating with other world leaders? Did you know the U.S. uses 25% of the world's natural resources when we only have 4%? Where do you think we're getting the rest of it, out our asses? Do you realize eight years of Republican financial policies has caused stock markets to crash all over the world, you stupid bimbo? Did you further realize that since we share the same planet with other people we might wanna learn how to get along with everybody? I clung to the Jaccuzzi with fingernails and teeth. Do not go over there. Do not get involved in that conversation.

And then,for no apparent reason, I burst into song. I learned Beethoven's "Ode to Joy" syllabically in German for a choir thing when I was about 14. I'm sure my rendition was passable at best. Freude, schöner Götterfunken, Tochter aus Elysium! Wir betreten feuertrunken, Himmlische, Dein Heiligtum!!

An odd thing happened. They stopped arguing and stared at me. Imagine that. I got up out of the Jaccuzzi, still singing; Deine Zauber binden wieder, Was die Mode streng geteilt!! By the time I got to Alle Menschen werden Brüder, Wo Dein sanfter Flügel weilt I was safely in the shower. The Squirrel Committee had fallen silent. So had pretty much everybody in the locker room. Nobody applauded, thank God. No thrown tomatoes either. Just silence. And sometimes the silence is best.

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